‘vanity’ plates

Saturday evening, as I was heading to Miller’s for an evening of celebration, I got stuck at a red light behind a new white Jaguar with the music cranked super loud, windows down, and the license plate, “SWAGUAR.”

And in that moment, I decided I wish I were the person at the DMV (or whatever they call it here) taking that vanity plate application. I would take it to the back room, run it through, and instead maybe hand him a plate that said “DCHEBAG”  or “CMPNS8NG” or “SMLL PNIS.” I’d say to him, oh, I’m sorry, that is already taken, but these have been suggested as alternatives we thought you would find suitably similar in meaning. Have a great day!


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