I am cat-sitting for my friend Sean. (Please don’t tell my landlord.) Sean just moved in with Brooks for the summer, who has two large dogs. The dogs probably wouldn’t mind Penny (the cat,) but Penny would probably mind the dogs.

Penny likes to eat my flowers. I discovered this a few nights ago as I was making dinner. I had a vase of sunflowers and some other taller purple flowers on my dining room table. I heard licking and chewing. Wondering what exactly she had found to eat, since there was no food in her bowl, I turned around. She was on my dining room table, drinking the water from a small drinking glass that, half an hour ago, had contained a broken stalk of the purple flower. Which I found scattered across my living room.

Since then, I have left the flowers on the table but pushed in all the chairs, depriving her of a leaping platform. It seemed to work. Then this morning I woke up to find she had ralphed pretty much everywhere, and there were purple flower petals all over my dining room table. Apparently mere chairs were not a convincing deterrent.

I cleaned everything, and since she seemed to be feeling better (and was desperately seeking attention) I gave her some real food. She then pestered me until I played with her at length. At one point she ran face-first into my sliding glass door. Then she went to sleep under my bed.

I texted Sean, telling him she was rather lively today, and he should come play with her since she’d probably appreciate a visit from her human. I also told him about her being sick from the flowers. To which he apologized, but I said, hey. She’s a cat. What do you expect.

Sean knocked on my door at 2pm. I opened it and he held out a bouquet of flowers to me. “What…?” He smiled and said, “To make up for the ones she ate.”

Penny will not be eating those.


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