all i want for christmas

My Christmas wish this year is that we stop being silly.

Hear me out. Classes ended last week, finals ended this past week. People are leaving for winter break. I have been wished “Merry Chr… er, Happy Holidays. I guess I should say that instead, huh?” by no fewer than three people. These people are my friends! And they look sheepish and embarrassed that they might have done something wrong and oh please don’t hold it against them. Guys! Come on!

We’re not corporations. We’re not public buildings. We’re people. Individuals with individual personalities. If you have it in you to wish me a Merry Christmas, do it! Happy Hanukkah? Sure! Happy Kwanzaa? Go ahead! A Most Blessed Solstice? By all means! If you’re going to go with the generically cheerful Happy Holidays, commit to it! Don’t use it as a replacement. Heck, you can even wish me a Go To Hell, if that’s what you want!

As for my part, you are not forcing me to do anything, so I PROMISE not to be offended. And, as I am also an individual with a personality, I will implement or decline your wish as I see fit! I might have a Christmas, but there might be nothing merry about it. I might have a mediocre Solstice. I might be happy but ignore Hanukkah completely. And I might go to hell if I feel like it that day! (And on the tiny, tiny chance that you say something which genuinely offends me – rest assured, I will let you know and offend you in kind. Probably simultaneously.)

So that is my wish. That we stop being silly because someone might not agree with our choice of winter greetings. Humbug, I say! Wish what you wish to wish. ‘Tis the season.


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