I had been rehearsing all morning. I was wearing a zebra-striped shirt, jeans, black flats, carrying a large black bag. It got to be about 3pm and I needed lunch. I drove home. I decided to get ingredients for soup, because soup is always awesome. This called for a trip to the Fresh Market.
I wasn’t about to go grocery shopping with my giant black bag and all its contents (binder of vocal music, various other pieces, metronome, planner, etc), so I transferred the essentials (wallet, keys, phone) to my much more reasonably-sized giraffe-print fall bag and headed out the door.
You’ve probably spotted the problem already. Long before I did. I spotted it as I parked at Fresh Market. I was wearing zebra and giraffe print. Two bold animal prints. In white/dark brown. Enough to land me on What Not To Wear. I got a few odd looks. I thanked my lucky stars I didn’t also throw on my leopard-print flats. I would have looked like the Serengeti.
On the other hand, would getting on What Not To Wear be so bad? I’m guessing they’d let me keep maybe half my wardrobe and buy me the replacement. Because frankly I can’t afford to upgrade it myself. I would undertake that beating for a new wardrobe in a heartbeat. I’ve said it before: I will happily dress like a bum for two weeks to get a new wardrobe.
So, just as a warning, if you happen to see me dressed as the Serengeti, I’ve decided that free clothes are temporarily worth more than pride. Also, please take pictures and nominate me. Thank you.
the art of the punchline 
or, a fashion fur paw, right?
It is completely my goal to end up on that show… as I need musicologist/teacher clothes. The plan: a) dress like a super frumpy academic while wearing accessories that are way too young for me b) move back to the States so I qualify for the show c)get nominated to be on it. Needless to say, part a is already in affect.